Self-talk: The science and practice of creating peace of mind | Viorica Vanica

Pain is inevitable in life. Something unpredictable or out of our power will always happen. What stays in our power is how we come back into a peaceful state of mind after going through a painful experience. You don’t want to spend five years (or even a lifetime!) recovering from a breakup! You don’t want to stop talking to a friend for months because of one fight. Life is too short to be wasted being consumed by sad, painful, uncomfortable, or any low-vibe emotions. But this doesn’t mean that uncomfortable emotions have to be pushed out or repressed. We’ve tried that out, and it never worked. Toxic positivity hurts too. Emotional storms need to be ridden out. And the way we ride them out makes all the difference. While writing this book, we agreed to write nothing else than the truth, and believe us; this was not easy. The tools you will find in our book have helped both of us to recover faster from painful events. They helped us be more “alive” in our lives and be present to our own emotions to the degree we choose to lean into the unknown and put ourselves out there through this book, trusting that this is the right path. In startups, this is called “building in public”, but in life, we call it “growing in public.” This book introduces a new thinking pattern to navigate the low times of life. It is based on acceptance and commitment therapy, one of the keys to peace of mind. We explored the concept of self-talk beyond self-affirmation and toxic positivity into discovering our dysfunctional beliefs and changing them. Our intention is that by the time you finish this book, not only will you be aware of how to recover from a painful event, you’ll know exactly how to do it. And most importantly, how to make it last.